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The Active Mindset

The Active Mindset

If you write, you’ve probably learned about passive voice versus active voice.

Example:

Passive voice: The miserable 5K was run by Amanda.
Active voice: Amanda ran the miserable 5K.

Passive voice: The effing push-ups were completed by Amanda.
Active voice: Amanda completed the effing push-ups.

Active communicates a stronger message. You lose words like “was” and “were” and the subject takes action instead of action simply taking place.

I’ve been thinking about active and passive in terms of mindset. An active mindset and the active pursuit of change will always be much stronger than coasting by on a passive existence.

The passive mindset is difficult to watch. The person who takes no responsibility because everything just “happens to them.” Part of maturing is taking responsibility and ownership, leaving behind the “woe is me” attitude. Learning that life is actually much better without drama than it is with it.

The active mindset ignores drama, capitalizes on the opportunities that challenges present, and innovates for constant improvement.

I’ve been taking a look at whether I am active or passive in regard to different aspects of my life.

I actively learn, read, and engage in critical thinking. My mindset is definitely active over passive when it comes to my work.

Until recently I was fairly passive when it came to my physical health. Random eating habits, sporadic exercise. The thinking that I don’t have time to invest in my health.

This has been the biggest change for me recently. I definitely have the active mindset in play now.

In relationships, I can see that I have the active mindset when it comes to those closest to me, but I’ve been passive in other relationships. I see this with family members whom I don’t see regularly and know there is more that I could do to stay connected. The same goes for friends with whom I don’t regularly communicate.

The passive mindset says, “Maybe I’ll hear from them around the holidays.” The active mindset picks up the phone or even just sends a text. It doesn’t take a phenomenal amount of effort, but it takes some.

The relationships that are important to me require effort and I’m going to be more active in applying that effort. I know it’s there. If I have energy to direct to a miserable 5K and those effing push-ups, then I certainly have it for the important people in my life.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. Us@BusinessofUs.com

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

Mom, Is Santa Real?

Mom, Is Santa Real?

​A week ago, my ten-year-old asked me about the elf in our home. If you’re not familiar, Elf on the Shelf is sort of a game for kids who believe in the magic of Christmas. You have a little stuffed elf. Every night you move the elf to a new location/position in the house. In the morning, the kids go looking to see where the elf moved in the middle of the night.

Parents who participate in this fall into two categories. There are the overachievers who stage elaborate scenes, like dumping a bunch of flour on the counter and then positioning the elf as if it was doing snow angels. (Spoiler: not me).

Most of us don’t go to extremes, but merely move the elf from a bookshelf to a spot nestled in the tree or peeking out of someone’s stocking. That’s about as elaborate as I get. We also get frustrated with the entire thing, because there are nights we forget to move the elf and it’s just one more thing we have to remember.

I was late to the Elf on the Shelf tradition, but gave in a few years ago. Even though I’m on the slacker end of the spectrum, I like the game. Honestly, I think it’s fun to move the elf around and watch the kids hunt for it the following morning.

(Like many parents, Mike does not share this sentiment… “Do we have to do the damn elf thing again this year?”)

But a week ago, one of my daughter’s friends learned the truth about the elf and spread the word. My daughter came to me, very serious, and asked for the truth.

“Do you really want the truth?” I asked. “Or do you want to believe what you want to believe?”

“Hmm. I don’t know,” she answered, because part of her just wanted to continue to believe.

A few hours later, before bed, she told me that she’d decided – she wanted to know the truth. So I confessed that I move the elf around at night. She cried.

The next morning, she asked about Santa. I chose my words carefully.

“There are a lot of magical things that happen around Christmastime and many people think that’s because of Santa. You get to decide what you believe. But when it comes to the presents in our house – that’s dad and me.”

There weren’t any more tears, but she was downright sad. (This was in contrast to my other daughter, who was excited when she learned the truth two years prior.)

With my youngest, the sadness wasn’t just from learning that elf isn’t magical and that her parents are the ones putting out the gifts in the middle of the night, it was also because she felt like she was the last to know. We’ve all been there and it’s not a great feeling.

We talked about it more on the way to school and I did my best to remind her that, in fact, she’s not the last to know. “Now it’s your job to keep that magic alive for all the younger kids,” I said.

At this, her face brightened a bit. As a fifth grader, she is older than most of the kids at her school. Her newfound knowledge went from depressing information to a responsibility that she takes very seriously.

So this will be our first Christmas with everyone in the know. I still have gifts hidden away that are from Santa, which of course are wrapped in different wrapping paper than the gifts from mom and dad.

And I’ll continue to hide the elf at night, save for the times when my daughter asks to do it. She knows now that the elf isn’t real, but she’s still willing to play the game and now wants the rest of us to have to find the elf in the morning. I’m more than happy to oblige.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. Us@BusinessofUs.com

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

If Happy Things Annoy You

If Happy Things Annoy You

The other day I read a comment on a friend’s post. The commenter talked about hating people who post on Facebook to show their “perfect” lives. How he feels sorry those people and wants to slap them on the side of the head.

Here are six great alternatives to feeling disdain for other people who might just want to focus on what’s good in their lives:

  1. Ignore it. If you don’t like what someone is posting, for whatever reason, simply scroll on.
  2. Hide the post. If it bugs you that much, hide the post. Then you’ll see less of that type of post from that person.
  3. Unfriend them. If someone is posting happy things about their life and your reaction is to want to do them physical harm, then perhaps “friend” is not a great descriptor of your relationship.
  4. Ask yourself why it bothers you. Does someone else’s picture of their dog or vacation or birthday dessert or kids on the first day of school actually harm you in some way? If not, what’s the real root of your reaction?
  5. Be happy for them. This one is truly shocking to some, I know. But it doesn’t cost anything to be happy for someone else. Happy for their big successes and the little joys alike. Let’s raise each other up instead of cutting others down.
  6. Take a break from the internet. Unplug for a day. Maybe longer if you’re still feeling so grinchy.

We all have control over what we want to put out there. There are times in the past when I’ve been snarky or dripping in self-pity or even downright mean. But I’ve learned that that’s not who I truly am. That’s not who I want to be.

The internet is an amazing tool. What we do with it is up to us. We can choose to learn, share, inspire, connect, and spread joy. Or we can use it to isolate ourselves, reinforce our limiting beliefs, breed negativity, and lash out.

I don’t know about you, but as far as I’m concerned, the choice is clear.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. Us@BusinessofUs.com

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

When We Document, We Get Paid in Confidence

When We Document, We Get Paid in Confidence

You’ve likely heard the phrase, “what gets measured, gets managed.” It’s a quote by Peter Drucker, and it describes how we should not expect great results unless we measure and track our progress.

When we document our progress, it pays us with measurable proof, which feeds our self-confidence, which is critical when doing hard sh*t.

Getting into shape, losing inches off our waist, learning a new language, publishing your writing every day, is all hard shit. Many days it doesn’t feel like I’m making any progress or improving in any way.

The best way I’ve found to combat these negative and unproductive thoughts is to track my progress each week. It allows me to see the improvements even when I don’t feel them.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. Us@BusinessofUs.com

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

Holding Out For A Hero

Holding Out For A Hero

Do you remember that song from Bonnie Tyler, called “Holding out for a hero”?
Here is a link to refresh your memory. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWcASV2sey0

It’s been in a few movies like Footloose, Shrek 2. I don’t when or how I came back across this song, but it recently found its way on to my workout playlist.

I’m not sure if I just have a thing for cheesy rock songs from the 80’s but this silly song has become my favorite when I really need to kick it up a notch in my workout.

Part of my morning routine is to stretch and then do 100 burpees as fast as I can. I listen to soothing music when I stretch, and turn on my workout playlist while I do some warm-up exercises before the burpees.

But for the last couple of weeks, before I start the timer for my burpees, I skip the music up to “Holding out for a hero.” The song is 5:47 minutes long, which corresponds with how long it takes me to do 100 burpees on a good day. So I’m also pushing to finish before the end of the song.

I don’t really know why I’m sharing this with you. This really isn’t a manly rock song after all. I’m certainly not embarrassed that I like this song.

But I do believe we are all holding out for hero, and that hero is us.

We are judged by our actions, and every day we are forced to make decisions where one path is harder, but much more heroic, and the other path is easier, and less heroic.

It’s extremely challenging to choose the heroic path consistently. But you can make the choice easier by playing your heroic theme song before deciding.

When my body wants to stop and take a break when I’m doing those dreaded burpees, this song helps me make the more heroic decision.

I challenge you to find your heroic theme song that inspires you to push harder, to pick the heroic path, and have it ready to play when you feel yourself slipping towards those less-than-heroic decisions.

We are all holding out for a hero, and that hero is you.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. Us@BusinessofUs.com

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

Are You The Cattle or The Cowboy?

Are You The Cattle or The Cowboy?

​I ran into an old friend recently who I haven’t seen in years. He told me that he has been following me on Facebook and that he was blown away by all the things he sees Amanda and me doing.

He asked about ImpactClub and Sugar Sisters (our daughters’ business), our recent trips to Europe, and Thailand, and he wanted to know more about the new venture he saw us working on called “The Business of Us.”

He asked me how we do it all.

And I reminded him that I’ve been a bit of a dreamer and that I simply haven’t stopped chasing my dreams.

And I was dead serious about it.

Parents tell their kids to chase their dreams, but the message somehow turns to chase job security when they become a young adult.

It’s common in our society to encourage people to chase their dreams, but it’s even more common for society to scare you out of such pursuits.

Our friends and family want us to stay safe, which is endearing, but it’s also how many of us get stuck in life. You end up feeling more like cattle than the cowboy.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions anymore because I make resolutions constantly. I’m always working on our next trip, our next venture, our next fitness challenge, our next charity event.

Chasing your dreams doesn’t have to mean quitting your day job and ignoring all your responsibilities so you can live a life of adventure.

But if that is how people view it, then it’s no wonder why they stop chasing their dreams.

All my dreams that I’ve chased down so far have come from long hard fought journeys.

Was it worth it? Hell yeah! It’s why I’m all-in about chasing dreams. It’s not just something to say to inspire others, it’s a way of life.

Happy Chasing,

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. Us@BusinessofUs.com

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

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