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Tag-Team Parenting

Tag-Team Parenting

This morning over breakfast, I told Mike about a project I’m working on and that I’m falling behind schedule. His immediate response was to carve out a portion of the day during which he would take the girls out and occupy them for a few hours.

This is a perfect example of tag-team parenting, which is one of the most important aspects of our family travels.

Mike and I work every day, whether we’re at home or abroad. Doing so when we travel sometimes presents challenges. I’m currently writing from Mexico, where we’re contending with unreliable internet and insatiable mosquitos.

The true difficulty in remaining productive work-wise when we travel is balancing work life and family life. My daughters aren’t interested in whether or not I’ve made headway with my latest work-in-progress. They just want to go to the beach.

If both Mike and I were fighting for time to get through our respective to-do lists without considering the other person, our household would quickly implode.

The key to keeping that from happening is tag-team parenting. If Mike knows I’m on a deadline, he’ll offer to take the kids for an hour or two. I do the same for him when I know he’s under pressure.

Acknowledging what your partner needs and then stepping up to help them is both simple and powerful. It’s about thinking beyond yourself. It’s about giving.

If Mike and I didn’t both have this mindset in place, I doubt we’d travel for months at a time to other countries. Our trips would have more stress and less enjoyment. By trading off the parental duties, we each allow the other the time and space needed to stay productive. And when we both keep current with our work, we’re able to enjoy our time together as a family without worrying about what didn’t get accomplished.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. [email protected]

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

If You Build It, They Will Come… Not Actually True

If You Build It, They Will Come… Not Actually True

I wonder how many people took that line from Field of Dreams and ran with it. I think a lot of people don’t realize that they’re operating from that mentality when they start something.

In Writing: I see a lot of people publish their books and then not understand why everyone they know isn’t scrambling to buy a copy. That’s just not how it works. And when writers fail to understand this (and accept it), they turn bitter. I’ve seen this happen often and it’s very sad.

If I read every book by every writer I know, I’d never have time to read anything else. That doesn’t mean I don’t read local. I’ve read books by dozens of local authors and I’ve read partial manuscripts from a dozen more. But they don’t expect it of me, just as I don’t expect it of them.

If someone is offended by profanity, I’m certainly not going to shove a copy of This Little Piggy Went to the Liquor Store at them. Modern publishing allows us further reach than if we were just selling from the trunks of our cars, so we shouldn’t expect our audience to center on those in close geographic proximity.

Also, having the expectation that someone will read your book just because they know you is arrogant, plain and simple. Writers who understand this are the ones who prosper and make real connections with readers in the long run.

In Real Estate: If You Build It, They Will Come… false. People get their licenses and then can’t understand why everyone they know isn’t calling them for help to buy/sell a house. The people they know might have longstanding relationships with other realtors they trust. And with over 5,000 real estate agents in our area, everyone is related to a realtor (or a few).

We can’t assume that the people around us are our audience. It doesn’t work that way.

It’s important to find your audience not based on the people with whom you are already acquainted, but rather the people who will actually benefit from whatever it is you’re putting out there.

It’s equally important to know who your audience is not. All of this informs us on how to best spend our time.

One of the best ways to hunt an audience is to put out varied content. It’s easy to get focused on one message delivered one way and then not understand why it doesn’t resonate with people. Maybe it’s the wrong message to the wrong crowd.

We have to try and test different things.

Like Heather Compton with her “Kindhearted Badass” shirts. When she first mentioned it to people, she got a lukewarm reaction. When she mentioned it in a different platform, a lot of the other ladies and I instantly raised our hands and said, “We’ll take one of everything.” She found her audience.

We’d do well to remember that the phrase, “If you build it, they will come” is from a movie about bringing back the ghosts of departed baseball players. It’s not a viable business approach.

Build it. Then find the audience who needs it.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. [email protected]

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

Duration has Nothing to Do with Intensity

Duration has Nothing to Do with Intensity

I used to think working for 15 hours a day meant I was applying more intensity to my work and therefore expected better results from my efforts.

But when I really examined where and how I spent each hour, I realized there was a lot of unproductive time mixed in. And when I say a lot, I mean it shocked me, once I drilled down each 15-minute block of my day.

My years of experience, my months of exercise, my weeks of practice, my hours of study, my minutes of writing.

All of these things can be done with different levels of intensity and focus.

I’ve discovered I can gain more experience in a shorter period of time by applying focused intensity to my business pursuits.

You can accomplish this through intelligent hustle. Being really busy doesn’t count. Working 15 hours being really busy may make you feel like you are accomplishing a lot until you log your focused productive vs. unfocused time.

My busyness came more from my lack of organization and systems for my business. This issue took me a long time to fully own and take actionable steps every day to curb my tendency to get distracted and disorganized with my productive time.

Operating more efficiently is a form of intensity you can apply to your business. Another form of intensity is being purposeful to learn and then apply what you learn. This allows you to experience higher levels of trial and error compared to your counterparts, so you learn and grow on a faster level.

It’s easier to picture higher intensity in terms of exercise because you are either going hard or being conservative. The advantage of going hard is that you can get the same or even better results in less time by ramping up your intensity. Intelligent hustle also applies here as well, because you don’t want to go so hard that you cause an injury that takes you out of the game, and you want to make sure you are doing workouts that will make you stronger and less injury-prone.

I can casually practice Spanish lessons every day for a month in between responding to Facebook posts and having the TV on, or I can immerse myself for 30 minutes each day with no distractions and see 10x the results in the same period of time.

Time investment does not run parallel to improvement.

More practice will lead to improvement, but results can be amplified through intensity of practice.

You want to get more accomplished in less time?
Apply more intensity to your pursuits.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. [email protected]

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

In Pursuit of Dreams

In Pursuit of Dreams

​There’s a saying…

Writers hate to write but love to have written.

This is a great example of what separates those who pursue their dreams versus those who do not. The key difference between the doers and the talkers is how they approach the pursuit.

Lots of people love the idea of the outcome, but not the pursuit, the hard work you have to commit to along the way.

They want to have written a book, but without all that pesky writing time.

They want to be in shape but without having to actually exercise.

If you can shift your mindset to find pleasure in the pursuit, you end up making bigger strides. Not fantasizing about the end goal, but taking each necessary step to get there, being present along the journey and finding joy in the slog.

I want to show my children, by example, that I not only dream, but also commit to pursuing those dreams. No one knows what I am capable of. Including me. I commit to pursing dreams, because I want to find out.

I was thinking about this the other day in terms of my kids, and kids in general. Adults are great at giving mixed messages. We love to tell little kids that they can be whatever they want to be. That they should dream big.

When they turn into teenagers and inch closer to adulthood, we start to chip away at that message. We encourage them to go for the sensible pursuit.

By encouraging something “sensible” or a fallback, we communicate our doubt about their capabilities.

I’m not bashing sensibility. I just think that too often we don’t give people enough credit. We assume they don’t know how to be resourceful on their own. We use criticism to put cracks in the foundations of their dreams.

I don’t want that for my kids. I want them to commit to pursuing dreams. And part of that equation is being an example for them.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. [email protected]

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

Your Team Matters

Your Team Matters

In my mid-thirties, I looked into joining a soccer team. My kids were little and I wanted something to keep me active, but also an outlet outside of my home. I’d played soccer as a kid and teenager, and had always loved the game.

The local adult league had an over-thirty team. Perfect!

When I inquired about joining, however, I was told they were full. “But there is a team still looking for players,” I learned from the league coordinator, “it just isn’t an over-thirty team.”

I contacted the captain for this team. She said they’d love to have me and told me when to show up for the first match.

“Is anyone getting together to practice?” I asked. “I’m a little bit rusty.”

“No,” she said. “No one really has time. We just play the games.”

“Okay,” I answered. I didn’t take this to be a bad thing. If anything, it was an indication that this was a fairly relaxed group, which was what I was looking for.

At the first game, I arrived to find that I was by far the oldest member of our team. The rest of my team ranged in age from 18 to 23.

No matter. They were happy to have a goalie and it felt good to lace up the cleats.

The other team, I noted, looked like it might have been the over-thirty team I’d been after in the first place. They looked a little older, a little wiser, and a little… happier.

It’s not that my teammates looked miserable, but they did appear to be incredibly serious. While the other team warmed up for a friendly soccer game, my squad readied themselves as if going to war.

I tried not to dwell on it and took my place in the goal.

At which point every red flag I’d picked up on came fully to light. Mostly in the form of red cards for my teammates.

They played dirty.

Soccer, for them, was a full-contact blood sport.

They even went so far as to try to pick physical fights with members of the other team.

What the hell?

These people need to look into roller derby or rugby, I thought.

No wait… MMA!

There was a time in my life when I was feisty, trash-talking, I-want-to-kick-some-ass kind of asshole. But I’d sort of grown out of that stage, you know?

I lasted a whopping two games playing both goalie and sweeper. My short-lived stint on the field wasn’t due to any moral high ground. Long before I ever got around to telling them that I wasn’t the right fit for their group, I realized I wasn’t physically up to the challenge.

After just two games, I’d done enough damage to my legs to knock me out for the rest of the season. I like to think I truly gave it my all, so much so that I left everything I had out there on the field, but it’s just as likely that I simply didn’t have the basic level of fitness needed to compete.

Either way, it was a blessing.

We only get so much (who knows how much?) time on this earth. And whether we want it or not, the character of the people we surround ourselves with will seep into our lives, into our own character.

And my teammates wanted to punch their opponents in the face.

You can see how that might be problematic.

With whatever time I have left on this planet, and in whatever capacity I spend that time, I’m going to make sure I’m surrounded by the right team.

I’m not just talking about sports, either. When it comes to business, you need a team with character and moral conviction that align with your own. For your own integrity as well as the integrity of your business.

If someone on your team repeatedly merits the entrepreneurial equivalent of a red card in soccer, you may both get thrown out of the game.

When it comes down to it, the integrity of your teammates matters just as much as their ability to show up.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. [email protected]

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

On Stopping to Think

On Stopping to Think

​Yesterday morning I decided to drive our youngest daughter to school. We only live a few blocks away and she typically rides her bike, but it was bitterly cold and windy. Checking the time also told me that if she rode her bike, she’d be late. I decided to take a few minutes and help her out.

She needed to be at school early for choir practice. There were quite a few other choir kids racing on foot or by bike to get there on time. As well, there were plenty of parents speeding to the elementary school to drop off their kids.

Think about that… speeding to an elementary school.

And here’s where it might be a good idea for us to stop and think.

Of course we don’t want our kids to be late. But that’s not a good reason to be racing your vehicle near an elementary school. I should also mention that it’s still dark at this time of the morning. And remember the part about lots of other kids hurrying on foot or by bike to get there too? Let’s not forget about them.

Here’s another way to think about it…

My kid isn’t late to school because of how fast or slow I drive.

If my kid is late to school, it’s because she wasn’t ready on time.

That’s where the problem originated. The lateness didn’t occur because of what my speedometer says. The lateness occurred much earlier, when she was getting ready for her day.

It might be my job to help her get ready on time, but it’s certainly not my job to try to correct her lateness by driving faster than I should.

The morning wasn’t unique. Every day in the few minutes that lead up to the bell ringing, you’ll see parents careening around corners while little kids are trying to cross the street.

What’s the worst that can happen in that situation?

And what’s the worst that can happen if your child is a few minutes late?

Just some food for thought.

Join The Community!

Join our Facebook GroupJoin the quest for “The Sweet Life.”  Request access to our Facebook Group.  Let’s learn from each other!  GO HERE

Free Audio Book Download

Full Unabridged Audio Book “Vagabonding With Kids” by AK Turner!  GO HERE

Take The SWEET LIFE Assessment

See how you score? Identify your strengths. Discover areas in your life you want to improve. GO HERE.

Giving Back

Amanda and Mike launched an Impact Club in their hometown of Boise, Idaho in 2017, and have had a blast gathering like-minded individuals, families, and organizations to make significant impact in our community, raising over $200,000 locally and over $1.5 million nationally.  

Join Our Next Monthly CHALLENGE

Every month Amanda and Mike pick a month-long challenge that pushes us out of our comfort zone so we can grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves.  Sometimes we design our own unique challenge and other times we join pre-established challenges. Email us to find out about our next upcoming challenge. [email protected]

About Us

Our Story | Mike and Amanda TurnerWe are Mike and Amanda Turner, founders of “The Business of Us.” We are fierce advocates of helping entrepreneurial couples and families improve their lives, livelihoods, and legacies… READ MORE

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